Post by Deleted on Aug 19, 2015 6:07:42 GMT
Hell, This place really turned out to fit how it was described. It wasn't a friendly place, it was full of evil. Full of people who did wrong, people with corrupted hearts. People that cared about nobody but themselves. It was boring, unexciting. Yet, Athren had found himself amoung those that had earned their way there. He had been there for months, bodyless. Powerless. He had nothing to do. In fact, there was nothing he could do.
Though he couldn't physically do anything, he was up to quite a bit. His body may have been gone but his mind, his conscience and his emotions still fully in tact. Without his body, the only thing the young saiyan warrior could do was think. It wasn't the best of situations, but it was the only thing he could do.
He often found himself thinking about how he wound up here. How it started, how it ended.
Realistically thinking, he had only showed up to the West Capital battle because he was concerned for a girl. Her name was Kaiyo, she lived there. If he hadn't met her. Things would've been much different, possibly even for the worst. If it wasn't for her his saiyan pride would've shined brighter, his itch for battle would've been more intense. He would've gotten himself into more trouble and thought less like a reasonable human and more like a blood thirsty, destructive saiyan. She gave him the view of humanity, the feelings that a human experiences. The ones that saiyan's aren't used too. Not only did she do that, but she accepted him into her life and made him a friend. That was new to Athren. He didn't have really any friends prior to that. With his new found friendship, he looked out for her. Though she believed she could take care of herself, that didn't stop him from trying to keep her safe.
Unfortunately, that led him to West Capital that unfortunate day. The day of his death, the day he was wiped off the Earth. Who would've guessed that the mighty super saiyan would've been defeated in his first battle as such? Foolish. Maybe the power had gotten to him? Maybe he felt indestructable? Whatever it was, it was a typical saiyan flaw.
With the loss of his life, Athren really had plenty of time to think over everything. He finally understood what it was like to meet death. It wasn't pretty. Though he never feared it, he didn't want to accept it yet. He was young. Twenty one years old. He had lots of life left to live and it was all taken from him. He was helpless, he couldn't do anything about it. It wasn't right. It wasn't fair. It wasn't proper..
All of these things had brought him a guilt factor. He had felt guilty for an event that happened to trigger his super saiyan transformation. Him and his best friend, the namekian warrior known as Ukare. Though they hadn't been friends for a long time, they're friendship was a good one. Sparring partners, allies, comrades. Hell, there wasn't a single thing that Athren wasn't comfortable telling Ukare. They had met in a city and challenge one another to a fight. Athren had heard namekians had the capacity to surpass a saiyan in battle. Athren had to find out if that was true, at that moment. It was. Athren got defeated when the namekian had transformed into his giant state. The battle went from Athren's trumph to his defeat.
After that, they had spent plenty of time together. Athren would remember it like it had all been yesterday, from the time a random child joined their spar to the time they had a tea party on the lookout. They were mostly all good memories, except Ukare's last few hours on Earth. Those weren't. They were dark and gritty. Blue skies covered by the darkness of night.
The tone fitting for the events that had occured.
After a battle with a powerful foe, Athren had let Ukare down. He would've been blasted into pieces if he had tried to assist. Ukare was saved by another saiyan that night. With a look of disappointment, Ukare left the scene. His feelings towards Athren at that time unclear.At that time, Athren wasn't too impressed either. Athren had shown up primarily to help Ukare but he believed there was only so much he could do. He gave his best up until the final conclusion of the battle.
Later on that very same night, Athren had travelled to the lookout to discuss the situation with Ukare. Unfortunately for the duo it was too soon. Both of their blood were still boiling for the excitement prior. They're ego's and attitudes boosted to the full potential. Words shot back and fourth for a brief period of time, it was then that the fists started flying.
The battle began swiftly, both fighters going at their best. No body was holding back, both with something to prove. Damage to the lookout began to show, the tiles breaking apart. The speed was incredible, the determination in both warriors was unbeatable. Neither refused to accept defeat, neither warrior willing to back down. The battle took place for quite a long period of time. Though eventually Athren had found himself pinned to the ground, a large transformed namekian placing on his weight on the saiyan's wrists. Sooner or later, something was to give. With a loud snap of wrists breaking echoing off the floating lookout and the gritty voice of the namekian warrior calling his old friend weak. Something snapped inside the saiyan. After a lifetime of being called weak and pathetic, he refused for it to be true. In a rage his eyes changed to a turqoise colour, his hair stood up on end and turned golden, his power level increased dramatically. It was in that moment that the saiyan had proved the Namekian wrong. He had flung him off and stood his ground. Quickly the namek had lost ground, he couldn't hold his own anymore. In his blind rage, Athren had went to finish the fight...
Knocking his friend off the lookout Athren had intended to insure that Ukare was down and out. He wanted no more resistance from the namek in him accepting his defeat. The saiyan warrior went off the lookout and darted down towards his friend. His feet slamming into his ribcage as they both quickly descended to the hard ground below. With the collision of Ukare hitting the ground a crator was formed. It wasn't overly big, yet it wasn't overly small either. With him standing ontop of his opponent, Athren had won. Though the price had been too much. Ukare's ribs had caved in. The injury fatal. Ukare did not survive this event and even though his friend had died, at the time Athren did not care. He proved just who was the strongest. He proved who was the best.
Now, given his current situation. Athren fully regretted this. His guilt was building more and more by the day. He wasn't capable of doing anything to fix it either considering he had been in hell without a body. At this time Athren had realized what it was like to have your life taken from you and being powerless to do anything about it. It wasn't right, it was wrong and what made it worse is how Athren didn't care at the moment of the incident. That wasn't who he was, it wasn't who he was supposed to be. He was exiled to planet Earth for a reason and it was now the he had figured out what it was. He was there to use his powers for good, the saiyan's didn't accept him for his differences but the Earthlings did. He was supposed to protect the innocent, not destroy them. He failed miserably, he found out what he was supposed to do too late. At this point, all he could do was suffer in hell. As far as he knew, there wouldn't be any chance of returning to the landscapes of Earth for a second chance.
If there was, surely he'd make the best of it. He'd make the proper choices and not abuse his power. He earned it, instead of wasting it.. he might as well do good.
Doing good had actually made the saiyan feel comfortable, though he was bred for slaughtering and destroying his opposition he could recall a time where a helpless black and white border collie puppy had found itself in the hands of an abusive owner. Athren had heard him crying and stepped in. Though Athren wasn't sure how it's owner faired out after recieving a powerful punch, the puppy was saved and had found itself a new home in a little apartment building with Kaiyo, Anzu and Athren. Who would've thought a saiyan would warm up so nicely to a puppy and an earthling girl? If Athren were to do good. He figured he'd have to pick a happy meduim. He'd only kill if he was forced too or if the enemies numbers were too big. He had to pick the reasons for doing such a thing and justify it. That way he wouldn't be stuck dealing with this guilt again. Of course at this point in time he was only thinking happy thoughts. Thoughts of a what if he had gotten out scenario.
As time went by the same thoughts had crept over the young saiyan. Kaiyo, Ukare, Anzu, Toma, Sprocket. All of them were running through his mind. He couldn't help but wonder where they were now. How they were doing without him.
He also grew a hope for if he ever got out. If he could have a second chance he knew exactly what he'd do. He'd make ammends with himself by protect the weak. He'd visit the site of Ukare's death and apologize. From there, he'd blast directly upwards to the lookout and yell for Toma like he used too. When he'd show himself, Athren would state that he wants in with the team that Toma had formed to protect the planet from threats.
That was a good start on the path of redemption and the most practical. Not only would he be doing the right thing, he'd have help and a friend along the way. Somebody to keep him from making the same mistakes twice. Guidance and a helpful approval on his judgement calls. Though Toma didn't appear to be a top class fighter, he did have the heart. He seemed innocent enough yet hell bent on protecting those in need. In this situation, the ideal situation.. Athren could really learn a lot from a friend like that.
Maybe Toma even found more goodies to fight for the cause? Maybe he actually got his hopes of having a team. If that was the case, that would've been even more positive reinforcement for the young saiyan warrior. He could use friends, the more the better. More people guiding him in a straight line. Even with Athren's current good intentions, he couldn't deny the fact that he was a saiyan. Saiyans were proud and sometimes that made them get out of hand. It was something he couldn't help.
Whatever the case on Earth was, Athren couldn't be apart of it. It was a shame. If he had his body, his potentially was unlimited. He was always one to push himself to new feats. One to strive to be the best he could be, the most powerful. He had the power, he had the new found motivations. He just wasn't alive and capable of using them. Why did it have to be now of all times? Honestly, it was just torture. Then again, that was why he was in hell, right?
He was there for punishment of the actions he made during his time alive. It was fitting but over his months there he had already learned his lesson.
As more time continued to pass by Athren remained bodyless. If there had been a clock present, Athren would've been positive that each tick would've echoed through his head a million times. He was tired of his situation, but who wouldn't be? He didn't have anything to do or a body to do things. He missed everything about Earth and being a living creature. From sparring with his allies to simple hanging out on the couch in West Capital with his dog Sprocket.
It was somewhat funny, Athren had taken all these little things for granted and now he's missing them. Even the little things like sitting around on the shoreline at a large beach after a long day of training. Hearing the waves crash against distant shorelines, the seagulls singing the song of their people, the countless stars that would emerge in the black of night. All of it, it was a luxury. Of course, the saiyan warrior didn't realize it then. He didn't value what he had, he saw it as nothing of importance. All he focused on then was getting stronger, not the environment or his surroundings. It was kind of a shame. Regardless, most of that was completely irrelevant now. His surroundings weren't anything of beauty, he was now surrounded by evil, a blood fountain and two german ogres.
Honestly, it couldn't have been any worse.
His thoughts continued to run through his mind at a mile a minute. Everything, from his past all the way to his present. He'd have changed so much, he would've appreciated everything he had so much more. He wouldn't have treated the life he had as a joke. He wouldn't have trained so much. He would've spent time with those whom mattered. He would've made an actual life for himself. One that didn't revolve around training, he would've made friends, allies, more than what he did. He would try and watch his temper, his pride. He would've acted in the interest of those who needed him instead of just acting for his own interests. He'd have generally been a good guy. He wouldn't have let the power of the super saiyan transformation get to his head. He wouldn't have let Ukare die in his fit of rage, he would've kissed Kaiyo and tell her how he felt, he would've been a better owner to Sprocket and spent more time with the furry little guy. He would've been a better friend to Toma, Anzu and Ukare. He would've helped that brat of a child become stronger. So many regrets. It wasn't fair, why did he have to be the way he was? Why did he do what he did? All over power? Selfishness? What was it? He just didn't have an answer.
His thoughts crushed him, they haunted, tormented and destroyed him. It wasn't fair.
Why did it have to happen this way? So many questions he just didn't have answers too.
He missed the wind ruffling through his hair as he blasted across the bright blue sky, he missed the feeling of water on his skin. He missed so much, and there wasn't a damn thing he could do about it.
During his months in hell, Athren slowly began to realize that there wasn't anything he could do. He was stuck here forever, he was giving up hope for anything. At first he had thought that maybe Kaiyo would've wished him back with the Dragon Balls but even now that had looked like a false dream. All he could do was accept his fate, the one that was given to him by a horrible person. One who killed for a reason unknown to the young saiyan fighter.
Maybe he was just chosen to have bad luck, from the day he was born he was an outcast. His unusual ocean blue eyes and grey tail had made him a target for the other saiyans, maybe that stuck with him. Maybe it was his attitude and mindset that brought him the troubles.
Hell, he didn't know. He just wish he had answers to all of these questions bouncing back and fourth through his mind.
Another question made him think even more. On the day of his horrid defeat, he wasn't the only warrior to arrive to West Capital to face the threats. There were others, An unknown saiyan and one he had met before. A girl name Ninjin. They left him alone to die. If they had helped maybe the outcome would've been different. Maybe they would've achieved a victory as a team, but no. Instead he got abandoned.
He swore that if he ever returned to Earth he'd never abandon those in need again, he'd see it through. He wouldn't freeze up in a dire situation. He'd use the fear of losing his friends as motivation instead of a reason to lose focus. He'd use the thought of his friends dying as a spark to ignite the fire inside of him. He'd use it to bring his absolute best into the situation. He'd do his best to triumph over any foe who would wish harm on the Earth or the weak. He wouldn't go down so easily.
All the things he'd have done differently continued to rush through his mind. His regrets, his failures. The wasted potentially that he once had. It was all gone, he was alone to spend eternity in hell as a floating orb.
Though, one thing did not make sense. Some who had been present in this place had their bodies. It seemed like a select few. Athren would've loved to know why, but it wasn't something he was capable of asking at the moment. Were they better than him in some way? Were they born residence of hell? Did they have a job to do? What? Why did they have the privalige that so many did not. There had to be some kind of explanation though.
It made sense for the ones who had been working the check out station to have their bodies but down here? Hell itself? Wasn't right. They had to be here for a reason, some evil deeds of some kind.
After tormenting himself with those thoughts, Athren began to float around hell. Almost exploring. He couldn't physically do anything but he could float. He resembled a lost soul, travelling the land and gazing for answers that would never come. His thoughts once again sat upon the topic of Ukare. The dead namekian friend of his, was he sent to heaven? He must have been. He was a good soul. He wouldn't harm a fly unless it was to protect something he cared about. He was honourable, respectful and brave. Stubborn too.
Athren couldn't help but wonder where exactly he was, he wondered if he had his body or if he was just a floating orb. He wondered what Ukare's surroundings were like, he assumed they were much more beautiful than the ones Athren had found himself surrounded by. Were their beautifully growing trees? lakes? Actually ponds of water?
Whatever it was, Athren had hoped it was much better than this place. Ukare deserved the best and he especially didn't deserve to be in the other world to begin with but that would be something Athren would have to keep with him for eternity. Unless their was death for the dead, but then what would happen? Would one just fade away and not exist? This was another thing that crawled into the thoughts of the saiyan.
Wherever Ukare had been, Athren had hoped his friend could forgive him for the mistake he had made. He hoped that someday they could reunite, even for a brief moment. Though that was high hopes he expected it couldn't come true. Two different beings at two different locations and the options of public transport weren't there.
Over the current time Athren had spent in hell as a bodyless spirit, Athren tortured himself with his regrets. His thoughts ate at him, he was stuck here. For eternity. His first major challenge would be to accept his failures and past and forgive himself. Then maybe he could rest peacefully. He died attempting to protect the only one he cared strongly for. His last deed was good but that couldn't compensate for the lifetime of wrongs.
He began to understand it, and hopefully in the future he could forgive himself as he realized he was better than who he used to be.
The second major challenge would've been something as simple as adapting to this place that he was stuck in. He'd be stuck there for a long time to come, he might as well try and get settled in quickly. The sooner the better. Maybe he'd stop torturing himself after those two steps were done. Then again, Athren couldn't know that for sure until the time came.
All he could do was hope, though his hope was dim. He was in a black tunnel with no signs of light.
Hope was gone, as was his future.
For now, All he'd have to do is deal with his actions and his current consequence.
:3 Since Athren's technically been in Hell for months, I tried to make it sound like it was thought out over time.
#HavingNoBodySucks. XD
Though he couldn't physically do anything, he was up to quite a bit. His body may have been gone but his mind, his conscience and his emotions still fully in tact. Without his body, the only thing the young saiyan warrior could do was think. It wasn't the best of situations, but it was the only thing he could do.
He often found himself thinking about how he wound up here. How it started, how it ended.
Realistically thinking, he had only showed up to the West Capital battle because he was concerned for a girl. Her name was Kaiyo, she lived there. If he hadn't met her. Things would've been much different, possibly even for the worst. If it wasn't for her his saiyan pride would've shined brighter, his itch for battle would've been more intense. He would've gotten himself into more trouble and thought less like a reasonable human and more like a blood thirsty, destructive saiyan. She gave him the view of humanity, the feelings that a human experiences. The ones that saiyan's aren't used too. Not only did she do that, but she accepted him into her life and made him a friend. That was new to Athren. He didn't have really any friends prior to that. With his new found friendship, he looked out for her. Though she believed she could take care of herself, that didn't stop him from trying to keep her safe.
Unfortunately, that led him to West Capital that unfortunate day. The day of his death, the day he was wiped off the Earth. Who would've guessed that the mighty super saiyan would've been defeated in his first battle as such? Foolish. Maybe the power had gotten to him? Maybe he felt indestructable? Whatever it was, it was a typical saiyan flaw.
With the loss of his life, Athren really had plenty of time to think over everything. He finally understood what it was like to meet death. It wasn't pretty. Though he never feared it, he didn't want to accept it yet. He was young. Twenty one years old. He had lots of life left to live and it was all taken from him. He was helpless, he couldn't do anything about it. It wasn't right. It wasn't fair. It wasn't proper..
All of these things had brought him a guilt factor. He had felt guilty for an event that happened to trigger his super saiyan transformation. Him and his best friend, the namekian warrior known as Ukare. Though they hadn't been friends for a long time, they're friendship was a good one. Sparring partners, allies, comrades. Hell, there wasn't a single thing that Athren wasn't comfortable telling Ukare. They had met in a city and challenge one another to a fight. Athren had heard namekians had the capacity to surpass a saiyan in battle. Athren had to find out if that was true, at that moment. It was. Athren got defeated when the namekian had transformed into his giant state. The battle went from Athren's trumph to his defeat.
After that, they had spent plenty of time together. Athren would remember it like it had all been yesterday, from the time a random child joined their spar to the time they had a tea party on the lookout. They were mostly all good memories, except Ukare's last few hours on Earth. Those weren't. They were dark and gritty. Blue skies covered by the darkness of night.
The tone fitting for the events that had occured.
After a battle with a powerful foe, Athren had let Ukare down. He would've been blasted into pieces if he had tried to assist. Ukare was saved by another saiyan that night. With a look of disappointment, Ukare left the scene. His feelings towards Athren at that time unclear.At that time, Athren wasn't too impressed either. Athren had shown up primarily to help Ukare but he believed there was only so much he could do. He gave his best up until the final conclusion of the battle.
Later on that very same night, Athren had travelled to the lookout to discuss the situation with Ukare. Unfortunately for the duo it was too soon. Both of their blood were still boiling for the excitement prior. They're ego's and attitudes boosted to the full potential. Words shot back and fourth for a brief period of time, it was then that the fists started flying.
The battle began swiftly, both fighters going at their best. No body was holding back, both with something to prove. Damage to the lookout began to show, the tiles breaking apart. The speed was incredible, the determination in both warriors was unbeatable. Neither refused to accept defeat, neither warrior willing to back down. The battle took place for quite a long period of time. Though eventually Athren had found himself pinned to the ground, a large transformed namekian placing on his weight on the saiyan's wrists. Sooner or later, something was to give. With a loud snap of wrists breaking echoing off the floating lookout and the gritty voice of the namekian warrior calling his old friend weak. Something snapped inside the saiyan. After a lifetime of being called weak and pathetic, he refused for it to be true. In a rage his eyes changed to a turqoise colour, his hair stood up on end and turned golden, his power level increased dramatically. It was in that moment that the saiyan had proved the Namekian wrong. He had flung him off and stood his ground. Quickly the namek had lost ground, he couldn't hold his own anymore. In his blind rage, Athren had went to finish the fight...
Knocking his friend off the lookout Athren had intended to insure that Ukare was down and out. He wanted no more resistance from the namek in him accepting his defeat. The saiyan warrior went off the lookout and darted down towards his friend. His feet slamming into his ribcage as they both quickly descended to the hard ground below. With the collision of Ukare hitting the ground a crator was formed. It wasn't overly big, yet it wasn't overly small either. With him standing ontop of his opponent, Athren had won. Though the price had been too much. Ukare's ribs had caved in. The injury fatal. Ukare did not survive this event and even though his friend had died, at the time Athren did not care. He proved just who was the strongest. He proved who was the best.
Now, given his current situation. Athren fully regretted this. His guilt was building more and more by the day. He wasn't capable of doing anything to fix it either considering he had been in hell without a body. At this time Athren had realized what it was like to have your life taken from you and being powerless to do anything about it. It wasn't right, it was wrong and what made it worse is how Athren didn't care at the moment of the incident. That wasn't who he was, it wasn't who he was supposed to be. He was exiled to planet Earth for a reason and it was now the he had figured out what it was. He was there to use his powers for good, the saiyan's didn't accept him for his differences but the Earthlings did. He was supposed to protect the innocent, not destroy them. He failed miserably, he found out what he was supposed to do too late. At this point, all he could do was suffer in hell. As far as he knew, there wouldn't be any chance of returning to the landscapes of Earth for a second chance.
If there was, surely he'd make the best of it. He'd make the proper choices and not abuse his power. He earned it, instead of wasting it.. he might as well do good.
Doing good had actually made the saiyan feel comfortable, though he was bred for slaughtering and destroying his opposition he could recall a time where a helpless black and white border collie puppy had found itself in the hands of an abusive owner. Athren had heard him crying and stepped in. Though Athren wasn't sure how it's owner faired out after recieving a powerful punch, the puppy was saved and had found itself a new home in a little apartment building with Kaiyo, Anzu and Athren. Who would've thought a saiyan would warm up so nicely to a puppy and an earthling girl? If Athren were to do good. He figured he'd have to pick a happy meduim. He'd only kill if he was forced too or if the enemies numbers were too big. He had to pick the reasons for doing such a thing and justify it. That way he wouldn't be stuck dealing with this guilt again. Of course at this point in time he was only thinking happy thoughts. Thoughts of a what if he had gotten out scenario.
As time went by the same thoughts had crept over the young saiyan. Kaiyo, Ukare, Anzu, Toma, Sprocket. All of them were running through his mind. He couldn't help but wonder where they were now. How they were doing without him.
He also grew a hope for if he ever got out. If he could have a second chance he knew exactly what he'd do. He'd make ammends with himself by protect the weak. He'd visit the site of Ukare's death and apologize. From there, he'd blast directly upwards to the lookout and yell for Toma like he used too. When he'd show himself, Athren would state that he wants in with the team that Toma had formed to protect the planet from threats.
That was a good start on the path of redemption and the most practical. Not only would he be doing the right thing, he'd have help and a friend along the way. Somebody to keep him from making the same mistakes twice. Guidance and a helpful approval on his judgement calls. Though Toma didn't appear to be a top class fighter, he did have the heart. He seemed innocent enough yet hell bent on protecting those in need. In this situation, the ideal situation.. Athren could really learn a lot from a friend like that.
Maybe Toma even found more goodies to fight for the cause? Maybe he actually got his hopes of having a team. If that was the case, that would've been even more positive reinforcement for the young saiyan warrior. He could use friends, the more the better. More people guiding him in a straight line. Even with Athren's current good intentions, he couldn't deny the fact that he was a saiyan. Saiyans were proud and sometimes that made them get out of hand. It was something he couldn't help.
Whatever the case on Earth was, Athren couldn't be apart of it. It was a shame. If he had his body, his potentially was unlimited. He was always one to push himself to new feats. One to strive to be the best he could be, the most powerful. He had the power, he had the new found motivations. He just wasn't alive and capable of using them. Why did it have to be now of all times? Honestly, it was just torture. Then again, that was why he was in hell, right?
He was there for punishment of the actions he made during his time alive. It was fitting but over his months there he had already learned his lesson.
As more time continued to pass by Athren remained bodyless. If there had been a clock present, Athren would've been positive that each tick would've echoed through his head a million times. He was tired of his situation, but who wouldn't be? He didn't have anything to do or a body to do things. He missed everything about Earth and being a living creature. From sparring with his allies to simple hanging out on the couch in West Capital with his dog Sprocket.
It was somewhat funny, Athren had taken all these little things for granted and now he's missing them. Even the little things like sitting around on the shoreline at a large beach after a long day of training. Hearing the waves crash against distant shorelines, the seagulls singing the song of their people, the countless stars that would emerge in the black of night. All of it, it was a luxury. Of course, the saiyan warrior didn't realize it then. He didn't value what he had, he saw it as nothing of importance. All he focused on then was getting stronger, not the environment or his surroundings. It was kind of a shame. Regardless, most of that was completely irrelevant now. His surroundings weren't anything of beauty, he was now surrounded by evil, a blood fountain and two german ogres.
Honestly, it couldn't have been any worse.
His thoughts continued to run through his mind at a mile a minute. Everything, from his past all the way to his present. He'd have changed so much, he would've appreciated everything he had so much more. He wouldn't have treated the life he had as a joke. He wouldn't have trained so much. He would've spent time with those whom mattered. He would've made an actual life for himself. One that didn't revolve around training, he would've made friends, allies, more than what he did. He would try and watch his temper, his pride. He would've acted in the interest of those who needed him instead of just acting for his own interests. He'd have generally been a good guy. He wouldn't have let the power of the super saiyan transformation get to his head. He wouldn't have let Ukare die in his fit of rage, he would've kissed Kaiyo and tell her how he felt, he would've been a better owner to Sprocket and spent more time with the furry little guy. He would've been a better friend to Toma, Anzu and Ukare. He would've helped that brat of a child become stronger. So many regrets. It wasn't fair, why did he have to be the way he was? Why did he do what he did? All over power? Selfishness? What was it? He just didn't have an answer.
His thoughts crushed him, they haunted, tormented and destroyed him. It wasn't fair.
Why did it have to happen this way? So many questions he just didn't have answers too.
He missed the wind ruffling through his hair as he blasted across the bright blue sky, he missed the feeling of water on his skin. He missed so much, and there wasn't a damn thing he could do about it.
During his months in hell, Athren slowly began to realize that there wasn't anything he could do. He was stuck here forever, he was giving up hope for anything. At first he had thought that maybe Kaiyo would've wished him back with the Dragon Balls but even now that had looked like a false dream. All he could do was accept his fate, the one that was given to him by a horrible person. One who killed for a reason unknown to the young saiyan fighter.
Maybe he was just chosen to have bad luck, from the day he was born he was an outcast. His unusual ocean blue eyes and grey tail had made him a target for the other saiyans, maybe that stuck with him. Maybe it was his attitude and mindset that brought him the troubles.
Hell, he didn't know. He just wish he had answers to all of these questions bouncing back and fourth through his mind.
Another question made him think even more. On the day of his horrid defeat, he wasn't the only warrior to arrive to West Capital to face the threats. There were others, An unknown saiyan and one he had met before. A girl name Ninjin. They left him alone to die. If they had helped maybe the outcome would've been different. Maybe they would've achieved a victory as a team, but no. Instead he got abandoned.
He swore that if he ever returned to Earth he'd never abandon those in need again, he'd see it through. He wouldn't freeze up in a dire situation. He'd use the fear of losing his friends as motivation instead of a reason to lose focus. He'd use the thought of his friends dying as a spark to ignite the fire inside of him. He'd use it to bring his absolute best into the situation. He'd do his best to triumph over any foe who would wish harm on the Earth or the weak. He wouldn't go down so easily.
All the things he'd have done differently continued to rush through his mind. His regrets, his failures. The wasted potentially that he once had. It was all gone, he was alone to spend eternity in hell as a floating orb.
Though, one thing did not make sense. Some who had been present in this place had their bodies. It seemed like a select few. Athren would've loved to know why, but it wasn't something he was capable of asking at the moment. Were they better than him in some way? Were they born residence of hell? Did they have a job to do? What? Why did they have the privalige that so many did not. There had to be some kind of explanation though.
It made sense for the ones who had been working the check out station to have their bodies but down here? Hell itself? Wasn't right. They had to be here for a reason, some evil deeds of some kind.
After tormenting himself with those thoughts, Athren began to float around hell. Almost exploring. He couldn't physically do anything but he could float. He resembled a lost soul, travelling the land and gazing for answers that would never come. His thoughts once again sat upon the topic of Ukare. The dead namekian friend of his, was he sent to heaven? He must have been. He was a good soul. He wouldn't harm a fly unless it was to protect something he cared about. He was honourable, respectful and brave. Stubborn too.
Athren couldn't help but wonder where exactly he was, he wondered if he had his body or if he was just a floating orb. He wondered what Ukare's surroundings were like, he assumed they were much more beautiful than the ones Athren had found himself surrounded by. Were their beautifully growing trees? lakes? Actually ponds of water?
Whatever it was, Athren had hoped it was much better than this place. Ukare deserved the best and he especially didn't deserve to be in the other world to begin with but that would be something Athren would have to keep with him for eternity. Unless their was death for the dead, but then what would happen? Would one just fade away and not exist? This was another thing that crawled into the thoughts of the saiyan.
Wherever Ukare had been, Athren had hoped his friend could forgive him for the mistake he had made. He hoped that someday they could reunite, even for a brief moment. Though that was high hopes he expected it couldn't come true. Two different beings at two different locations and the options of public transport weren't there.
Over the current time Athren had spent in hell as a bodyless spirit, Athren tortured himself with his regrets. His thoughts ate at him, he was stuck here. For eternity. His first major challenge would be to accept his failures and past and forgive himself. Then maybe he could rest peacefully. He died attempting to protect the only one he cared strongly for. His last deed was good but that couldn't compensate for the lifetime of wrongs.
He began to understand it, and hopefully in the future he could forgive himself as he realized he was better than who he used to be.
The second major challenge would've been something as simple as adapting to this place that he was stuck in. He'd be stuck there for a long time to come, he might as well try and get settled in quickly. The sooner the better. Maybe he'd stop torturing himself after those two steps were done. Then again, Athren couldn't know that for sure until the time came.
All he could do was hope, though his hope was dim. He was in a black tunnel with no signs of light.
Hope was gone, as was his future.
For now, All he'd have to do is deal with his actions and his current consequence.
:3 Since Athren's technically been in Hell for months, I tried to make it sound like it was thought out over time.
#HavingNoBodySucks. XD